Wednesday, November 24, 2010

What I am Thankful For...

The time has come to say goodbye to this nightly routine that I go through 3 nights a week of....



First locking the front door and then placing Matt's bike in front of it, this way no one can break in quietly.......

Next I place the siren alarm doorstop under the back door....... If someone is breaking in I am going to hear them!

Then I turn the living room light off, dim the dinning room lights, and turn on the hall light.... not too bright, but bright enough that there will be no surprise attack.....

Then I place the other siren alarm doorstop under the back door in Matt's office. I also place skis in front of the door just to make sure that I will hear someone breaking in....

Attack bunny always by my side. (His eyes only turn red when he is in attack mode or he is getting his picture taken....they are normally beautiful brown!)

Then I barricade the bedroom door with pillows, this way there is a little light that shines in but Harvey can't escape the bedroom. It's amazing how one little rabbit can sound like a burglar trying to break in at 3 am. (After that he lost all privileges to roam the house at night)


Then I turn the TV on to an old black and white Cary Grant movie... The volume turned down to level 3.....


Next I turn on the soothing sounds of Joshua Radin, volume level 4, so just barely a whisper. Of course this is more to drown out the sounds of our crazy neighbor building a secret room in his backyard at 2 am..... Oh the hammering.....


Then I place my two phones on my nightstand.... and set all three alarms (my hope is to at least hear one of them to wake up in the morning). I also place my keys on my nightstand. The keys have two different functions: 1. So if someone was to break in (hypothetically) I can escape out the back, hop in the car, and drive away 2. They also serve as a good weapon.... right in the eye...


Of course I always have to leave my bedside light on in order to see my phones and keys.... I have horrible night vision!


And last but not least, just in case the keys fail me, I have a butcher knife hidden under my pillow.......just kidding, I keep it on Matt's nightstand ;)

But after tonight I will not have to go through this routine anymore.... This is Matt's last PICU night shift. Starting next week he will be working day shift in the PICU!!!

And we will live happily ever after.........

I guess one thing I might keep with me though is this adorable attack bunny!

4 comments:

Rob said...

Dude, your wife has issues. However, she hasn't been murdered so maybe she's a genius. I kind of feel sorry for you now that you can go to bed at the same time. It will only take the tiniest, faintest sound for her to wake you up to "investigate." You are expeceted to take the place of that butcher knife. Let's face it my friend, you are many things, but a deadly weapon isn't one of them. You guys are hilarious.

RachelSoper said...

The. best. post. EVER! I love it! Carol...you may be a little OCD =)

Matt & Carol said...

Rob- You are right. I am a genius! :)

Rachel- Thanks! and I will claim my little bit of OCDness, I am sure Matt will agree! :)

Mandy said...

Wow Carol, I had no idea you did this! It'a a little crazy, but if I had a neighbor building a secret room in his backyard I think I'd do it too! Love ya!